


Where do people like us float?

by ladyclockworkpastels



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Falling In Love, I'm Bad At Tagging, M/M, Off-screen Relationship(s), Pietro and Loki may be a bit OOC, Suicidal Thoughts, but no actual suicide or self harm, depressed!Loki, hyperactive!pietro, if i forgot something just tell me and i'll tag it later
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-11
Updated: 2015-05-11
Packaged: 2018-03-30 02:40:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,066
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3919828
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ladyclockworkpastels/pseuds/ladyclockworkpastels
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clint Barton is just trying to spend his third college year in peace, find a nice work and build a family, but when the hyperactive runner Pietro Maximoff, freshman, enters in his room for the first time he knows that all of his plans have to be rewritten.</p>
<p>Or</p>
<p>The college!AU nobody asked for, featuring Tony and Steve being way to much attracted to each other and Thor and Loki being actually adorable together.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Where do people like us float?

**Author's Note:**

> So... first fanfiction published on AO3 EVER and, most of all, first fanfiction written in english. I have to warn you all that English is NOT my mother language so this may have some terrible mistakes. 
> 
> This contains all of my OTP's in this fandom and I absolutely adore this Loki and this Pietro, really, they are amazing in my opinion lol.
> 
> Oh well I'm so nervous to publish this, I hope you all will enjoy^^

  
  


Clint opens the door of his room. It still has some of his stuff, like posters and books. He and Henry Pym, his roommate, had this room since freshman year. Since Henry is studying in England now, probably he is going to have it all for himself.  
He leaves his bags on the floor, positioning his bow and arrows in their angle between the bed and the window. He spent the whole night on the train to arrive at the college and he is tired. Instead of putting his stuff at its place, he decides to lay on his bed for a while.  
The only thing he likes about college is the assurance of a future, with a nice work, probably in a office. Clint doesn't want to take risks, he wants a quiet life, after his high school years where he was a reckless and volatile guy.  
Laying on the bed, his arms crossed in the back of his head, he is almost falling asleep, but…  
He hears someone opening the door. Which is weird, since only he has the key in the dorm. Then someone storms into his room and Clint opens his eyes, just to find a stranger in his room, standing right in the middle with three suitcases.  
"Uhm... who are you?" he asks, getting up to look better at him. He is tall, slim, blue eyes and the hair are white. White. He must be crazy. Who the hell bleaches his hair until they are white?  
"I’m Pietro. Maximoff, Im a freshman. I’m your roommate! The freshman dorm is full so they put me here with you" this boy talks fast as he answers his question and Clint crosses his arms. "Fine" he said, "I’m Clint Barton."  
His simple presentation seems enough, for now. He hopes that the guy will shut up and not ask stupid questions he doesn’t really wants to answer.  
But Pietro is an hurricane. He not only talks fast, but also moves even faster. And he can not stay quiet, not even for a second.  
He is, opening his suitcases on the bed, letting all the stuff fall out of it, explaining Clint why he is here, what he is studying, where he is coming from, but he is distracted by literally everything. In a second, every single word that leaves his mouth brings him to another subject. His mind is running, but keeps hitting obstacles during the action. His talk is difficult to follow, for Clint.  
And he thought this was going to be a normal and quiet year. He shakes his head, already missing his old roommate.

Loki considers himself nothing more of a _damned broken soul lost in the depth of the most dark ocean the universe has created_ , or “just a fucking depressed loser”, like those dumb idiots from high school called him. The fact is that they couldn’t understand poetry at all, so he decided that he couldn’t understand their stupid language of hate. That usually led to punches and bruises, but Loki wrote about those things too. “This adds to my tragic backstory” he said, to himself obviously – he didn’t have any friends, he didn’t need them, ignoring the fact that he was closing himself in a shell.  
A shell that is still there, at his sophomore year.  
The only person he barely speak to is Tony Stark, his roommate, who hates him because he always leaves pens and sheets everywhere and he once dirtied with ink his favourite t-shirt. Not his fault, because Stark never put his clothes away, he leaves them everywhere in his room and then it’s Loki’ duty to keep it clean and not messy.  
Loki hates the mess in his room as much as the mess in his head.  
“Loki. Loki. Loki!” the voice of the most irritant human being in the whole planet wakes him up from his staring-the-white-sheet-until-I-have-inspiration thing.  
He raises his eyes from the sheet (still white, damn it) and looks into Tony’s eyes. He, as always, doesn’t feel the need to speak until something is asked to him. He learned that being that sassy sarcastic boy he was years ago was only bringing him to _the pure pain that the mind feel in the Hell of thoughts and_ – “I’m going out and I want to get laid, so if I come back with someone…”  
“I’m out of the room. Yes. I know” Loki says, before Tony can even finish the sentence.  
Loki raises his eyes. His roommate is always partying and having all kinds of fun... with both boys and girls. He found himself out of his own room so many times he has lost count.  
He sighs, this is just the first day of this year together.  
"Perfect. See you later... or maybe not" Tony says, taking his jacket, his cell phone and a pack of cigarettes that is actually Loki's (Tony is too lazy to go and buy his own). Then he gets out of the room.  
Loki is now alone; he doesn’t feel the need to go out to parties and meet new people. Tony is enough for a lifetime, even thought that the guy never talks to him outside of their room, if not to inform him about his plans for the night or if something has happened to the room, with his dumb experiments. He doesn’t even feel the need to have sex or have a relationship. Why someone would ever want him anyway? And why would him want to have someone?  
Now that he is alone, he can finally concentrate. He looks at the sheet for five minutes more and he writes:  
_Between sin of the flesh  
And sweet corruption  
Could the world be more damaged?_

Clint can’t believe this bullshit. Not only Pietro is the most irritating human being, but he is also insomniac. And he is fucking tired of him talking. It’s been hours, for Christ’s sake.  
It isn’t even a sensed talk; he is talking about colours.  
C o l o r s. Clint is going to send an arrow straight to his heart.  
"You know, green is boring. Everything is green. And blue? Is ok I guess, but you know what is cool? Purple. I like purple. Maybe I should dye my hair purple."  
Pietro is laying on his bed staring at the ceiling and he doesn’t looks like he is about to get asleep to Clint. He wishes he would just stop talking and sleep, sleep for hours, like Clint really wants to do now. His pillow is so soft and comfortable and waiting for him to close his eyes, but the fucker is still having his non-sense talk and _Im killing him, Im killing him._  
"Do you like purple?" Pietro asks to him, like he remembered that Clint is still there, in the same room as him.  
"Yes. I like purple. Now sleep, boy" he tells him. At least the white haired guy isn’t doing a soliloquy and cares enough to make him join the conversation like before... but this isn’t the right moment, it is three AM and Clint is tired. He wishes he could insult him or something, but actually he is too much a good and nice person to do this to the person he has to spend the year with. So he just tells him once more to go to sleep, before pulling the covers on his head.  
Pietro laughs, and Clint throws a pillow in his direction.

Tony feels so much better now that is outside of that room. He loves college, he is smart, he is cool, he is really far from home... but he wants a roommate that won't try to kill him while he sleeps.  
He already sees the title on the newspapers: "Smartest guy in the world killed by literature psychopath."  
He sighs. Probably they are too different; Tony is an inventor, one that looks towards future. Loki looks towards the past. And he is a sociopath.  
He shakes his head to wipe away the thoughts, directing towards the dorm of Alpha Phi Delta. He is not too fond of sportive men or ex cheerleaders, but usually the alcohol is good and he likes being the smartest in the room.  
They always party; Tony can hear the music even from afar and when he gets near the building is loud and horrible (Tony prefers rock, but he can stand electronic for three-four hours, if he drinks enough, obviously). Not even Tony, back at his hometown, did organize those many parties in his high school years; college is really another world.  
He enters, unseen he slides near the tables and fills himself a cup. Holding it then he searches for familiar faces.  
Oh, there he is: directly from Richmond, graduated with an athletic scholarship, Mr Muscle, Steve Rogers, loyalty, friendship, sportsmanship and all this shit.  
Tony doesn't really knew him before college - they spoke once, probably - but they both found themselves alone in another city, another state so they had only each other to socialize (apart from roommates...).  
He raises a hand to catch his attention and he reaches him, in the other side of the room. Steve is talking with Thor Odinson, a big and blond guy who studies medicine. Tony never talked to him before, but he is Rogers' friend and he looks like a Viking.  
"Captain!" he salutes him, calling him the name everyone called him when he was quarterback in Richmond. Steve laughs, puts an arm around his shoulders (he probably drank a bit more.)  
"This is Thor. Thor, Tony!" The blonde Viking is nice looking, really nice and he is staring at him, but before Tony can even think of a plan...  
"Laufeyson roommate, right?"  
Tony hated how Loki ruins his life even when staying locked in the room. There is absolutely no way that he, weird and silent and asocial, is more interesting than Tony. No fucking way.  
Thor askes two or more questions about him and Tony decides to change objective. His eyes finds a red-headed girl in the crowd, but Steve interrupts him before he could even take a step in her direction.  
"She has a boyfriend."  
"Oh what the fuck, Captain, do you have to ruin all the fun?" he says, raising his eyes. He offers him his alcohol filled cup. "Drink something." Steve looks like he is about to die by just tasting the drink on his lips, but Tony manages to convince him. And he goes and takes two more cups for the both of them because really, nobody has ever seen Captain Rogers drunk and he is super sure it’s something really entertaining.  
It’s doesn't take much and Steve is immediately grabbing him and taking him to dance. This dance is one of the most sexual Tony has taken part and he realizes that Steve is a very horny drunk.  
Not bad, he thinks, while he presses himself onto Steve's body, feeling his hardness against his leg.  
No, not bad at all.

\---

Pietro only sleeps two hours at night, since he was a child. His sister, Wanda, learned how to make him fall asleep, but this worked only when he was little. After his twelve birthday, stories and songs weren't in his interests anymore, so he couldn’t sleep anymore.  
The problem comes when he is excited for something, like the first night in the college dorm. He was so happy to be there that he didn’t sleep at all... and now this Clint, his not so lovely roommate, is angry at him. It isn’t Pietro’s fault at all, but obviously the other boy doesn’t really know that.  
And probably Clint now is even angrier, cause he is following him everywhere. He still doesn’t know anyone in the school except for him and Wanda, he has to wait until the lessons started to meet new people.  
Lucky for him, just one more day.  
At lunchtime he usually sits on a table with his sister, who let him talk about everything he wants and patiently listens to him. But now, in the big courtyard of the canteen, she is nowhere to be seen. He takes his phone, sending her a quick message asking her where she is.  
Then his eyes search for Clint, his only other option.  
Pietro runs towards him, calling his name. Barton looks at him, exasperated. The white haired guy sighs, cause he has already understand that he isn’t really welcomed in the older's life. His phone vibrates, signalizing Wanda's answers to his message.  
"Tell me, Maximoff."  
Pietro realizes he got distracted again, staring in silence at Clint's face. One of the guys sitting on a table, with big Rayban sunglasses and short dark hair, smirkes in his direction.  
Keep calm, Pietro, play it cool and nobody is going to make fun of you.  
"My sister isn't joining me for lunch, probably, so I decided to stay with you today!" He wonders if he looks as ridiculous as he sounds.  
Clint looks at the people sitting. Rayban guy nods, a grin still on his face. "Fine" Clint says and Pietro is going to hug him when they are alone. Maybe.  
He sit at the table while Clint explains who he is. "My new rommate, Pietro." He sits next to him. "Pietro, those are Tony" he points at the Rayban guy, "Bruce" talking about the boy with glasses and a big bag full of books, "and Natasha."  
Natasha is the only woman in the group and she looks scary; red hair, black clothes, a piercing on her bottom lip. She raises an eyebrow looking at him, then she completely ignores him. Pietro is fine with that. He doesn’t like her either. Actually, the only one that seems not a total scary person is Bruce, but he stills only likes Clint. Too bad he has weirdos for friends.  
He never was a weirdo; back in high school Pietro was cool, a bit of the class clown, but never an outsider.  
Pietro checks his phone, finally. It’s Wanda just as he has predicted and she says “not gonna come, see you later.” He puts away the phone, not really satisfied by the answer. He will interrogate her later.  
He listens in silence to them talking, while he eats, and he never felt in this way before; nobody is caring about what he is doing, if he keeps blinking or moving his leg under the table cause he can’t stay still. In kind of amazing, actually, cause he clearly remembers everyone he met in his life making references to his tics that sometimes shows up.  
Clint looks at him three of four times and he smiles a bit to him every time. He still wonders where the hell Wanda could be.

Loki doesn’t like eating with the others and the canteen of at the yard. He doesn’t have a table to sit if not totally alone and he is sure that is he showed up everybody would ignore him.  
So he sits in the corner of one of the college buildings, near the classes. He has with him his lunch and his notebook to write or just fill the pages with ink stains. Loki doesn’t need nobody else.  
After all, he is unique. Nobody is like him, there, and he kind of feel better than them. He is smart. He is going to be someone after college, he is…  
Not alone anymore?  
Some voices are coming from the building’s inside. He remains there, in the corner, knowing he would become invisible as usual. Two people step outside. Loki doesn’t know who the girl his, black clothes, a red jacket… but he knows who the man is. Professor Vision, Sociology and Anthropology.  
Loki has no friends and not a real human contact (that is not the cold courtesy of Tony Stark) since he was born, probably, but he can read humans quite well, after having observed them for years, and he can feel the attraction the girl is feeling about the professor.  
He smiles, widely. Is common that little freshman girls falls for their professors. He finds it ridiculous.  
When Vision returned inside the building, not before having said goodbye to the girl by touching lightly her shoulder – honestly, Loki is disgusted by that – she turns away and… she notices him.  
Which is kind of weird, but Loki plays it cool, making it as he never saw her pining over her own teacher.  
“Ehy, you!” she calls for him. He sighs, raising his eyes from hi notebook and looking straight to her eyes, probably trying to intimidate her. It doesn’t work. She walks toward him, probably with the intention of talking with him.  
_Those reckless mortals trying to interact with demons souls_ … “Why are you here alone?”  
Oh no, she wants to be friendly. God, Loki hated the fake smiles people do when they are trying to understand him and his loneliness and his liking books over people. At least books don’t try to interact with you when you clearly don’t want interaction.  
Loki is struggling to ignore her, cause she is close now and demanding to be respected just by staring. She is a weird one, he thinks.  
"What do you want?" he asks, noticing that he is failing and she is still there.  
"Know why you are here alone" she repeats, crossing her arms.  
"I like it. Loneliness" He thinks that if he satisfies her with his answers maybe she will disappear.  
"Weird."  
Oh, now he is the weird one, not the freshman that wants to fuck with professors and likes to bothers strangers.  
"Says she..." he says and oh, now he is being rude, but is not like she can beat him. She is too short anyway. "Leave me alone, ok?"

Clint is, surprisingly, standing Pietro a lot more than the days before. Maybe is because he is finally quiet and not talking all the time (and even if he tried, Tony would shut him up with sarcasm, Nat would try to kill him and Bruce... well he is rarely angry, but Clint doesn't like it).  
Anyway, this being calm and still doesn't really seem normal (why is he even deciding what is normal or not about Pietro? He barely knows him), so he looks at him and taps gently on his shoulder.  
"Everything's alright?" he asks. The white haired guy nods, "sure" he says and he doesn't look like he is lying, so he return talking with Tony, who is still fantasizing about the robot he wants to build.  
He is listening quietly when a young girl appears at their table, looking at Pietro, who is not noticing that she is there and is staring at the ground, probably drowning in his own thoughts like always. Clint reaches for his shoulder, to wake him up.  
"Uh?" he raises his head. "Wanda!" he smiles. "Clint, this is my twin sister."  
Actually, looking better, they do look a bit alike, even if they are fraternal. She, though, is a bit more creepy than her brother. But they have the same accent.  
She sits next to Pietro and "I had the most weird encounter. A guy was sitting alone against a wall, I tried to speak with him and he just treated me like shit." sue tells him. He looks at her, obviously not happy.  
"Who is he? I'll punch him in the face." he immediately says, raising a bit his voice.  
"I don't know..."  
Tony interrupts them.  
"Black hair, pale as a corpse and hating on everything that exists?"  
She nods; Tony smirks. "Loki" he says and Clint snorts, thinking about Laufeyson. Pietro may be irritating, but Loki is the worst roommate ever, according to Tony.

Steve barely drinks, and for a reason: he doesn't like to become handy and that much outgoing. He barely recognise himself in this cases and Steve likes himself in his normal way.  
So he can't really bear with last night’s events: it’s not even that clear in his mind but luckily (or maybe not) Thor remembers everything perfectly and he has to face the issue. He would rather forget about everything and not having doubts anymore.  
He slept with Stark. Probably; he is sure he danced with him and that he kissed him in a very sexual way, according to his friend, and he also know they went to his room after that, but in his minds the fact are blurry and Thor can't tell if they had sex, but certainly they slept together in the same bed (Thor took a photo that now he is staring at). Tony left before Steve could get up and now he is too embarrassed to go and ask him an important thing like that.  
This is so awkward.  
He still can’t tell from the photo, even he now has memorized every detail. By the way they touch in their sleep, it seems that they were really intimate before, but that could be the drunkenness, so?  
"I hate to bring this up, but you both seem naked" Thor says. Steve looks at him and then the photo. "You are right..."  
"You can't keep imagining what happened, you have to find out. Go and ask him."  
"Thor, I can't, he is surrounded by people, it’s too embarrassing, I..." he searches for him, sitting on his tablet with his usual friends (and two more people he never met). He meet his stare, but he doesn't look like he is bothered by it as much as Steve is. It must be normal, for a boy like Tony Stark, to have people falling at his feet every time. Since high school, where both boys and girls always preferred the coolest nerd (and, also, the richest) on Earth to everybody else; Steve would pay to go back in time and be friend with him for those years.  
"Maybe you could try later, maybe you can go to his dorm and talk to him in private." Thor says, its the simplest idea ever but Steve didn't thought about that, probably because is brain is distracted by anxiety.  
Steve nods and his eyes meet Tony's once more. "I’ll go tomorrow" he decides, stopping looking in his direction and finally putting away his phone. "After lesson."

\---

Clint soon discovers that Pietro doesn't study at all - and that Pietro doesn't like to let him study in peace. The boy can’t stay still neither when he is reading or highlighting words on a book.  
He already got up five times: one to get water, one for candies (he keeps them in his bag and he is always eating some, like his body can’t stay too much without sugars), one was to go to the bathroom, one because he left the light on in the bathroom and the last one was just for “stretch a bit, I can’t sit for too much time, you know?”  
Is this even possible? Clint never saw someone being so energetic and active, not even kids can be that way.  
“Clint?” Pietro calls for him. Clint’s eyes leave the book and look in his direction. “Do you mind if I read out loud some passages of the book? I can’t really get them if I don’t hear them.”  
He is about to say no, really. Cause he has to study too and concentrating with Pietro in the room is already too much difficult without a voice distracting him.  
Something in Pietro’s eyes convince them, like he absolutely needs to and without doing that he would probably fails… Oh fuck him and the puppy eyes. “Yes, yes. Do it, I don’t mind as soon as you don’t make too much noise.”  
How can he be so kind with the most hyperactive and distracting person in the world?  
Things get better for the white haired boy, though. He is not moving as before and while he reads – it’s probably the better way to study, for him. Not compatible with Clint’s way, who pretends silence, total silence, but he guess that he can stand that for a bit.  
He looks at him while he reads; he smiles a bit, then, because concentrated Pietro looks… cute? Clint can’t actually describe it. Pietro has its own terms to define him; like he is from another planet, him and his stupid white hair.  
After something like fifteen minutes, Pietro stands up again. “I think I need a pause. Probably you need one too. We can go out, do you want some coffee?”  
“I don’t need anything, just get out if you need to speak with someone, I’m almost done and…”  
“And you can finish later. Please? I hate being alone and I really want to go outside” Pietro begs him, takes his left arm with both his hands and tries to pull him off the bed. Clint nearly falls, cursing.  
“No, Pietro, just let me…”  
“It’s sunny!”  
Clint is surprised that, just by looking at him, in his eyes, he is easily convinced by the white haired boy. He sighs and gets up, closing his textbook. Pietro basically pushes him out of the room.

Tony is looking at a project, in his room, when he hears knocking on the door. It’s obviously for him, because his roommate doesn't have friends.  
"Already got a date?" Loki lifts his eyes from the paper to speak with him. His ugly smirk is the one of a fucking asshole.  
Tony has to bite his tongue to not insult him as he goes and opens the door. He is surprised as he sees Steve, smiling embarrassed. "Hi" he says, scratching his neck, "Can I come in?"  
"Sure" Tony says, nodding. He turns towards Loki, who is staring at them. "You. Out."  
Loki sighs as he takes his stuff, notebook and all the rest, and he leaves the room, banging the door with resentment filled strength, but still not saying a single word. Why is he is weird?  
"Weren't you a bit rude with him?"  
"He is used to." Tony says simply while he makes Steve sit on his bed, while he stands in front of him.  
“I wanted to speak with you” Steve says.  
“Go on, then.”  
Tony knows exactly what Steve is going to say; it was just a matter of time, actually. He watches as he starts to speak.  
“I need to know what happened that night, Tony, I literally can’t keep living without knowing that. I have all this movies in my head about what could have happened and…”  
“So you kind of want that something happened, right?” Tony interrupts him with a smirk. Steve is predictable, but cute and funny to watch as he struggles with words.  
“I don’t know! Can’t you just tell me what happened?”  
“I can’t. I don’t remember anything too.”  
Steve’s eyes widen, filled with surprise. Probably that was really unexpected. Just before he can say something, probably some excuses about his behaviour or something like that, he says “But there is no need to worry about. If you are here, that means that you have enjoyed… whatever happened.”  
Tony’s brains elaborate stuff so fast that sometimes words leave his mouth without even giving him the time to realize and, even if most of the times is something really smart, sometimes it puts him in some difficult so he simply adds “So did I” with a lot of astonishment both from himself and the Captain.  
“You did?” Steve stares in disbelief, probably wondering if he is just messing with him. Probably he is not, but again he immediately says “Yes” without actually thinking about the current situation they are both in.  
He shuts up, finally, to think about it a bit more. Or, at least, is what he is planning to do – over analyse the facts and then probably sending Steve away because who the hell has time for dealing with a boy like that – but this isn’t in Steve’s plans. Because the Captain is more of a man of action, that doesn’t think too much about what to do in these situations, so he stands up and just kisses him, pressing him against his body.  
He doesn’t return immediately the kiss and Steve pulls back, releasing him from the grip he had. Tony kind of misses it, it’s a nice feeling after all.  
“Sorry.” Again with the excuses. Tony raises his eyes and decides that if he kisses him now, he probably would stop thinking he did something bad. He does that and he is immediately satisfied with the results, as the kiss is returned with both passion and enthusiasm. 

Thor sees him sitting alone outside the library. Loki, is, like always, writing, so much concentrated on what he is doing. He questions himself if he should approach him, like he always does when he finds him. Loki doesn't have any friends and is alone all the time. For Thor, such a thing is almost impossible. He has lots of friends and is the vice-president of his brotherhood, so he knows almost everyone who is in a sisterhood or in another brotherhood. He never felt loneliness since elementary school, for him is so strange that a person can survive alone. That Loki can survive alone.  
He sighs, deciding that this time he is actually going to talk with him. Probably Loki would appreciate this. He always seems miserable at Thor's eyes.  
He slowly approaches him and, very gently, puts a hand on his shoulder. Loki raises his eyes and looks at him. "What? I'm occupying your spot?"  
The tone he pronounces those words is incredibly hostile. Thor is sure that is must be so hard, to always be alone and being used to being treated like shit.  
"Oh, no, not at all." He sits in front of him. "I'm Thor" he says, smiling. Loki doesn't return the smile. "Loki" he says and he starts to write - or, at least, try - again, without saying another word.  
The silence is too much for Thor, used to laughs and loud noises. "So... you are always writing. Or reading."  
"Yes. So?" Loki looks really bothered. Probably he is thinking that he is trying to make fun of him.  
"I think it's interesting. Uhm...what do you write?"  
Loki flinches back, trying to get away and far from him, like he just asked him to kill a person. "Oh, no, I don't want to read your stuff if its private. I...just... you know, prose, poetry..."  
Loki seems to relax a bit; those things he write must be very important and Thor respects that.  
"Poetry" Loki says. He holds the notebook with a tight grip, protective of the object.  
"That is cool! I have never met a poet before."  
"What do you want from me?"  
The question leaves Thor very surprised. Before he can say something, Loki continues. "You aren't in any of my classes. I can't pass you my notes. So what do you need?" Loki keeps talking, while Thor is more and more confused. "Oh, I get that. You want Tony. Well, sorry to destroy your dreams but Tony now is probably having sex with your roommate, Rogers, so..."  
"What? No!" Thor is kind of shocked now. "I just wanted to speak with you. Just... talk, ok?"  
Loki raises an eyebrow. "And why?"  
"Well, you are always alone and..."  
Loki is... laughing? A really weird sounding one, like he is not really pleased or amused but just... making fun of his words. He is bitter, his laugh is.  
"I like being alone, you big blonde idiot" Loki says, the insults meant to offend him just makes Thor more sad about his situation. He is really against the whole world alone. He is not going to let it happen.  
"Nobody likes to be alone, trust me. Neither do you."  
He really means that.

\---

Its now seems to be an habit to he and Clint to go and train together. Pietro doesn't really do anything, he just likes to run until he is so exhausted he can't even breathe without a fire burning in his throat, but Clint... well, Clint seems to be deeply into archery. He told him he won some competitions too.  
Its one of the coolest things ever; everyone does normal sports like football or volleyball or basket and Clint does archery. It’s sick.  
Now, Pietro has just stopped running, breathing heavily while he reaches for the water bottle, laying on the grass, so he stops to watch him, pulling the arrow and, with a clean and perfect precision, hit the centre of the target.  
"You are lucky the college has an archery club, otherwise you'll have to run with me. So boring, yeah?"  
Clint looks towards him. "Nah, you are way too fast for me. And you have more stamina. I'll be dead after a couple of minutes."  
Pietro smiles at the compliment, happy that, at least, Clint notices some things about him that are not just the lack of attention and other bad habits.  
Clint helps him to get back on his feet. Pietro feels a bit weak now, after all that running that he almost falls. Clint holds him immediately.  
"But I won't fall at all! Cmon, I have just complimented you on your stamina, don't make me think you are just a pretty boy!"  
"What am I, excuse me?”  
Pietro and Clints looks at eachother. Clint looks like he doesn't know what to say. What does that even mean? That the thinks that Pietro is pretty, that he is attractive? This is...  
"Awkward."  
Pietro doesn't know why he said that instead of just thinking it. Too late anyway. He stands, not needing help anymore, and he puts some distance.  
"Yeah, awkward" Clint says. "Uhm... I'll go back to the dorm. You?"  
"Just a few second. I have to... speak with Wanda a second."  
Clint nods, taking his stuff and waving to him while he heads for the dorms. Pietro takes his phone and immediately calls his sister.  
She picks up almost immediately. "Hey Pietro, everything is alright?"  
"No. I may have a problem."  
"What is it?" She sounds worried. Pietro takes time, not really knowing what to say.  
"I think... Clint said I'm attractive?"  
He heards Wanda laughs. "So? You should be happy!"  
"I don't know how I feel about that."  
"Maybe its because you have a tiny crush on him?" Wanda asks, leaving Pietro really surprised. "What?!"  
"Hey, I'm just asking. You should take it as an option."  
Pietro doesn't know. He didn't see that coming.

"I still don't know what to with him. I mean, we've kissed and it was an very good kiss, but now? Am I supposed to go to him or just wait? Or...just forget about everything? Thor, are you even listening?"  
Steve waves in front of his face. His friend's eyes are looking in the crowd, exploring, probably searching for Loki Laufeyson since he announced he wants to befriend the guy. Probably an impossible task, so he could at least listen for five minutes and then he will be free to search his favourite psychopath.  
"Uh? Sorry, I swear I listened, I just..." his eyes scan the crowd once more. "Nothing. Continue..."  
"I really just want advices on what to do with Tony..." Steve feels like a desperate twelve years old girl on her first crush. Even if Tony is probably his first actual "crush" or "interest".  
Thor puts an hand on his shoulder (he always do that, he feels more wise probably) and "Steve, honestly, if you like him... just go and get him. If you stay there waiting you'll just miss the chance."  
Doesn't seem like the best option right now. "Yes? But he didn't said anything, I am not sure he is really interested and...Thor!"  
"Sorry." The blond is again looking for Loki, probably. "Not here..." he mutters, then he looks back at him. "It’s been days. Stop making excuses and just go talk to him."  
He has to think about it. Tony is rarely all alone, but he could try at least to get to know him better and socialize with his friends.  
"Can we sit at lunch with them later?" he asks Thor, who finally removes his hand and says "Can't. I have to...study; actually, I really have to go. But I'm sure you will manage this at its best."  
Thor leaves, after wishing him good luck and Steve finds himself alone (or with the company of casuals teammates) until lunch.  
Immediately, when its time, he goes to Tony's usual table, trying to seem normal and not embarrassed as he is. Tony's friends, which he only knows their names, all looks at him.  
"Hey! I wondered if I could stay there?"  
Tony smiles. "Sure! But where is your viking roommate?" Steve smiles at the definition. "He is probably searching your roommate."  
"Oh no, poor him, he is going to be weird too. Oh well, not all roommates can be like the happy couple!" Tony says, pointing at the two guys he know as Clint and Pietro.  
They both look at Tony like he is mad and Barton says a confused "What?" while the other slightly becomes red, noticed only by Steve and by the girl who should be his sister, Wanda.  
The rest of the table laughs. Tony, then, lets him sits next to him, really, really close.

Loki thought he hated humanity. He decides he doesn't hates it...just despise it a bit. It's people like Thor that he really hates.  
The blond guy seems to have in his mind only one thing, and its being friends with everybody. And Loki doesn't really get that. He really wants to be alone and instead he has this guy always around. And why him?  
Loki knows who Thor is. First of all, popular and with a lot of people crushing over him. He could be with anybody who he likes and he has already so many friends. He obviously doesn't need Loki, so?  
He sighs; he used to look at people like him with hate (envy too) and now he has that blond giant around him all the time.  
Loki sees him arriving and throw himself into the book he is reading, hoping that maybe in this way Thor would just let him read in peace.  
"Loki!"  
All of his hopes... destroyed. Loki sighs again, cause not even today he will be able to stay in peace.  
"How are you?" Loki hates that question. "Fine" he says, but how can just a word explain everything he is, actually, feeling?  
Fine. More like _my peaceful state was broken by a nightmare disguised as a friendly individual._  
"What are you reading today?" Loki doesn't answers that, but instead he lets him read the title and the name on the cover of the book. "Rimbaud?" He pronounces it wrong. Loki corrects him and then Thor seems to recognize the name. "Oh! You said you really like this one!"  
Loki remembers telling him that; he still doesn't know why, but Thor seems to have this power to obtain everything he wants.  
"Yes, he is good. Not my favourite, thought."  
"Then who is it?"  
Loki still doesn't trust all this interest for poetry the boy is showing. But still... is a nice way to get some culture into a frat boy's head. "Edgar Lee Masters. Spoon River."  
"Isn't that the one all about dead people?" A spark lights in Loki's brain; maybe he is not that dumb. "Epitaphs. But... yes." he nods, a bit happy that at least he understands. "It’s an anthology, you know? Of all the people who lived there, how they lived and how they died."  
Thor seems truly interested, actually listening to him. Which is weird, for Loki, used to people ignoring him despite his enormous intelligence.  
"Tell me your favourite one."  
Loki could stay hours wondering which one is the one he most likes, but there is one that he can relate the most.  
" _My life’s blossom might have bloomed on all sides  
Save for a bitter wind which stunted my petals  
On the side of me which you in the village could see.  
From the dust I lift a voice of protest:  
My flowering side you never saw!  
Ye living ones, ye are fools indeed  
Who do not know the ways of the wind  
And the unseen forces  
That govern the processes of life."_  
The way Thor is looking at him now makes him almost blush.

Clint is woken up by a cold wind that hits his face; he shivers a bit, opening his eyes and finding the window open. The room is at the first floor, so what he sees is Pietro, just in an oversize t-shirt and boxers, standing outside.  
Clint sits, watching him. He doesn't notice that he is awake, so he slowly stands up and reaches him at the window.  
"What are you doing?"  
Pietro immediately turns towards him. He smiles, awkwardly. "Couldn't sleep. I wanted to wake you but you were sleeping well and it seemed a pity, so I just...eh" he shrugs, turning back staring at the night. "We both should go to sleep now" he says, and to convince him he puts an hand on his shoulder, to pull him inside. "You go. I really can't."  
"Why?"  
"Not tired." This is not the answer he is asking for, actually. He gets that, that Pietro is never tired and is the most active person ever, but it’s the cause that the doesn't get - at all.  
"No, why? You are never tired, you have problems with memory and attention, you can't stay still... why do you act like this?"  
Pietro sighs, like he is used to being asked what is wrong with him. Clint didn't wanted that to sound in an accusing way.  
"I have ADHD. I know it’s annoying. Sorry."  
First, the fact that he is saying sorry for a thing that he can't control is wrong. Second, fuck, Clint feels like a douchebag. He judged Pietro for so long without even thinking about it as a real problem.  
He is the one who is sorry.  
He gestures him to go back inside; once he is in, he closes the window and sits back on the bed.  
"That sucks. Must be horrible."  
"I’m quite used to it, actually" Pietro says, sitting next to him. "But the thing that suck is when you actually bother the people around you. Like I... bothered you all this time."  
"You didn't bothered me." It's a bit of a lie, actually, cause he felt annoyed at a lot of aspects of Pietro’s hyperactivity, but he can make him feel better and from now on he will never be bothered by Pietro again. He looks sad now. Clint sighs.  
Oh what the hell, he thinks as he pulls him into a hug, cause he really needs one now. He lays still holding him.  
The hug continues until Pietro is asleep.

\---

Pietro is heading to class when a slightly agitated Wanda takes his arm and pulls him away, saying that they need to talk. She takes him in a more "private" place (and empty classroom, really?) then, she closes the door and...  
"I may have accidentally an affair with my professor."  
That is unexpected. "What? W-who?" Pietro is surprised and shocked. "Mister Vision" she says.  
Is she lying? It’s the most crazy and stupid thing to do; his sister wouldn't...  
"Wanda please, tell me you're just kidding..." She remains silent, confirming what she said. "Oh shit. What the hell? Why?"  
He doesn't hear everything - he doesn't even want to hear how he is smart and kind and hot, not by his sister - while he elaborates the fact that what she is doing is A) probably illegal and B) something that must remain a secret.  
"Ok, I need you to tell me what happened. Did you two had... sex?"  
"No!" Wanda almost shouts, crossing her arms. "Just kisses. And lots of flirting, I suppose."  
"Who...initiated it?" Because if he did, he is going to break his nose. He is not even noticing how he started moving back and forth, nervous.  
"I did." Well, no prison for him, probably, but still "I told him last week."  
"Last week? Why didn't you tell me before, then?!"  
"Cause he said he feel the same just yesterday!"  
She is treating the thing with way less anxiety than he is. He is supposed to protect her, but he is failing, if he lets her doing things that could put her in big problems. Like… being expelled and probably ruining a man’s life.  
"Wanda..." he sighs.  
"At least I've had the courage to confess my feelings."  
That’s it; when Wanda becomes his mother, scolding him and giving him advices. And he thought this conversation was about her and not him. "Wanda, I don't have nothing to say to Clint..."  
Wanda laughs. "I love how you thought immediately about Clint when I've said feelings, brother." She, sometimes, is too smart and thoughtful for him. He looks at her. "Promise me you'll tell him, ok? Everybody has noticed your chemistry."

"So, you'll never let me read what you write, right?"  
Loki shakes his head at Thor's question. He sighs, already knowing the answer, but he was still curious about it. Loki has such an interesting personality and, even if Thor doesn't understand nothing about poetry, he is sure he'll appreciate Loki's.  
"You told me you wanted to publish them and become famous and important..." Thor remembers the ambition in the boy's words. "How can you without making people read them?"  
Loki looks at him like the answer is the most simple ever. Smiles, a little, and just saying "posthumous"  
"What?"  
"After you die, they publish your stuff. The majority of famous people in the past were only appreciated after their death."  
Loki is actually right, Thor thinks. "That will take you years, Loki, you are really far from your death."  
Something changes in his expression, like he is wondering either to say or not a thing. Thor's curiosity is now even bigger.  
"Thor, I'm not planning on waiting that long."  
"What does that mean?" He doesn't understand. If he doesn't want to wait, then there is no point in wanting this to happen.  
"Well. First, I will complete my work." Ok, that is quite clear to understand. "Then I'll just... find a way."  
This sounded... wrong. A way, Loki said, and Thor now is fearing the unthinkable.  
"A way for what, sorry?"  
"I don't really want it to be messy, but the dramatic effect is needed. For obtaining this, blood is required." Loki says, mostly to himself, like he is still planning everything with precision, while Thor listens and tries desperately to realize what does all of that mean. "I'm not really sorry for those that will have to clean after."  
_After_. Loki is planning his death by suicide just to be dead and with some tragic backstory, ready to be used to make people love his work. And the problem is that he is so quiet and cynical talking about it is scary.  
The thought of that pale body dead and covered with blood is so powerful that is hits him like a punch. Those green eyes lifeless? Thor can't accept that, he doesn't get how a soul could be so ruined to be cynical about his own death. His own death.  
They are both silent. Loki doesn't seems bothered, but Thor is sure his face is showing all of his shock.  
"A-are you mad? You want to take your life away just for..."  
"Maybe I am. I don't expect you to understand." Loki now seems offended. He stands up and goes away, angry, as Thor watches him.  
He never wanted more to protect someone like he does now. The problem is: how do you protect someone from themselves and their own creations?

Clint sees Pietro running towards him, catching him just before he opens the room door; he looks at him, raising an eyebrow.  
“I… want to talk with you.”  
“And you needed to run like a mad man? I’m here and I’m not going anywhere.” he smiles and Pietro… blushes? The pink in his cheeks made visible by the white in his hair; probably is just that he ran.  
“It’s just… I saw you…” Pietro is so embarrassed that is cute. “Ok, tell me then.” He opens the door and let him enter first. Closed the door, he turns to look directly at him.  
“Tell me, then.” Pietro stays silent. It’s the first time he sees him without words, like he literally can’t speak. Pietro is never that quiet. Never.  
“So…”  
“So?” Clint is becoming impatient.  
Pietro seems to be too much tense, even more than he usually is. Why? What is making him like that?  
"Pietro, is everything alright? Something happened?"  
Now Clint is really starting to worry. He takes a step towards him but Pietro takes one back, like he is scared or something. "Don't get mad or... don't shoot me with an arrow, please, ok?"  
Clint nods, even if now he is the scared one. "What have you done?"  
"Just please promise me you won't get mad at me!" Pietro says, a nervous wreck. "But..." "Promise!" Clint sighs and promises him to not get angry at him, even if he is still worried.  
Pietro takes a big breath and looks directly in his eyes. "I think... Ireallylikeyou!" he shouts, talking so fast Clint barely understands. Barely.  
"Pietro... c-can you repeat? Slowly." he orders him.  
"I... like you. Like... really like you."  
Oh.  
Ok, that is unexpected. Clint never noticed before; Pietro is a bit expansive, but never in a non-friendly way. But maybe Clint is just dumb and he has given the kid false hopes for all of this time.  
Well, probably not total false ones... Pietro is sure attractive, smart and sometimes fucking adorable. But is not that Clint feels this way...  
"Oh my god, I'm sorry, really, if you think it’s wrong or that I have absolutely no hopes just... tell me, please, and if you want I can even change room with somebody and you'll never see me again, but at least say something..."  
Clint realizes that his silence is too long; Pietro looks really desperate, over talking, nervous. He wants to hug him. Instead, he talks.  
"I don't want you to change rooms. It’s just... it was a bit of... shocking" he says, sitting on the bed. "Pietro, are you sure? Like... I'm older and not exactly the best partner you could have."  
"You are just three years older, c’mon... and you are the best person I have ever know..."  
Pietro seems to be really into him, not just having a crush, but he is young and so lovely... "it’s just a crush, it will pass in a second, don't bother with me, ok?"  
Now he seems on the verge of tears; "what?" he asks, a bit shaking. Oh no, he is not going to give a panic attack, right?  
"Pietro, listen, is not that I don't like you... but I don't think we could ever work. And you can have so much more than me."  
"B-but, if I like you and you like me then...then..." he looks at him, eyes begging him to re-think about it. But Clint shakes his head, so he, crying, storms out of the room.  
He doesn't come back for the whole night.

\---

They are alone in the room, in a full make-out session. God, Steve may be a typical nice boy next door, but he can kiss and hold Tony in a way that actually brings him to madness.  
It's so possessive, like he's glad that Tony is his and he wants to keep him just for himself.  
Tony would be happy to let that happen.  
For the first time he wants this; not just go to parties and enjoy sex, but also try the whole package. Sex, he hopes, but also waking up next someone and kissing, so much kissing, and cuddling and all of this stuff that makes a… relationship!  
He feels kind of dumb, and so much more young, when he had his first girlfriend and the whole thing was embarrassing (but also kind of cute).  
Right now, he is laying on top of Steve, who clearly wants more than just kissing, he is sure and he can tell by his body, but is probably too kind to ask.  
Adorable; he bites his bottom lip, gently.  
"I still think about that night, you know?"  
Tony doesn't like when things are interrupted, so he slides a hand under his t-shirt, hoping that maybe Steve would change idea and decide to not spend their time talking.  
"I mean" Steve continues, even ignoring him but also smirking, cause he probably understood that he is very impatient, "aren't you curious about what happened?"  
"No" he whisper against his skin. He really doesn't care. "I'm curious about what will happen now."  
Steve seems to understand perfectly this time, while he kisses him again. They continue to make out for a while, until Tony decides it’s enough and remove his t-shirt and unbuttons his pants. Steve does that too, but also talks again.  
"I guess we'll never know, then."

Everything is going bad now. Not only he has a fucking bodyguard everywhere he goes, but also the bodyguard is first of all protecting him from himself, but also so fucking attractive and Loki can't stand this. Can't even bear with this, he never felt attracted to someone until now and this someone is making him crazy because he is convinced he is going to kill himself anytime.  
Which is not what is going to happen, until his work is not completed.  
But his project was to be unhappy and die alone and a friend (or even something more, this is what Loki is scared of) like Thor would ruin everything.  
"Loki!"  
Shit, he found him. He is probably scaring him a lot because he hides frequently. Thor gives him for dead about five times a day, he is sure.  
"How are you?" he asks, sitting next to him, scanning him, probably searching for something that would confirm his fears. Loki would never be so naive to let people see scars, if he had them.  
Somehow, the stare Thor gives him when he says he is perfectly fine gets on his nerves. He doesn't know what it is that makes him so angry, maybe the fact that he is not used to having someone who cares, maybe he just doesn't like being protected, but...  
"You don't believe me, uh? You think I'm fucking crazy, like anyone else, so just go away and stop bothering me!" he shouts, pushing him away with so much strength that after he feels even tired and, most of all, guilty.  
Probably he shouldn't treat this way the only person that cares about him. Probably he should just go and let Thor forget about him.  
He expects anything, now. A punch, a slap, being hit, being insulted, but certainly not an hug. A proper one, Thor's arms are pulling him against him and... it’s nice, very nice.  
"Now I understand..." Thor says. For Loki there is nothing to understand, just him and his madness. "You think your life is not important and you're hoping your death will be better. But oh, Loki, you are important. There is no need to crave death, I'm here and I want to help you."  
Loki doesn't even notice he is crying until Thor wipes away the tears, that keep coming more and more.  
It is beautiful, cause Thor is such a good person and he could be with his friends now, with someone that doesn't hate life and doesn't hate humanity and is less bitter, but he choose him, an almost lost cause he is willing to try and win anyway.  
Thor kisses his forehead and Loki melts in his arms, that still hold him tight.  
He doesn't expect peace in his mind but now he can hope for it.

Sleeping is even harder now. Two hours are to be considered as luck, since Clint refused him.  
What was he thinking? That Clint would like him back and that they would kiss and be together?  
Pietro is nauseated by everything; living with Clint now should be hard, one would think, but they are barely seeing each other, actually. Most of the times someone is sleeping out and during the day Pietro avoids everyone.  
It's all his fault and he wants to apologize, but that would be useless. He and Clint were almost friends before, but now he doubt they would ever be something again.  
He is laying on the bed, but the hyperactivity has already made him do multiple travels to the mini fridge or the bathroom. He wishes he could maybe sleep, even if its afternoon, but he has tried everything and nothing works.  
When he is starting to think that he would die from sleep deprivation, the door opens and Clint is suddenly in the room.  
The ceiling is more interesting than him in this moment.  
"Ehy" he says, trying to smile to him; Pietro feels bad because Clint doesn't feel bad (or, at least, doesn't seem like he do).  
"We should talk." Pietro doesn't like this. Talk means bad news, means that maybe Clint wants him out of their room. He would understand, really, having someone who likes you and who can watch you when you sleep (it happened just once or twice, but Clint is... attractive even when he sleeps) in the same room as yours may be very uncomfortable.  
He looks at him while still being in silence. Which is torture, by the way.  
"I apologize. It was all my fault and this situation needs to be fixed. I mean it."  
It's surprising how both of them think that this is their fault. Maybe it's the both of them, it's their fault, not just Clint's or Pietro's.  
"Ok."  
"Just...ok?"  
Pietro doesn't like this question. "What should I say? You basically broke my heart and I was stupid enough to think we had a chance. The end."  
If even Pietro can feel the hostility and the pain of being refused in his own voice, he doesn't imagine how it must hit Clint.  
He feels it when he sits on his bed in silence, that is still killing him by the way. He needs distraction, he needs attention.  
"I didn't..." Clint tries to explain himself, but fails, not knowing what to say. Everything now would feel irrelevant and stupid. Instead, he choose action over words and simply takes and holds his hand.  
Pietro likes the sensation and doesn't never want to let go that hand.  
"I like you so much" he whispers, not looking in his eyes cause he might kiss him. Then Clint lays next to him, still holding his hand. "You sure?" he asks. Pietro nods.  
He feels an arm around his waist and a pair of lips softly pressed against his.  
"I like you too."

That should have been a regular year; Clint was convinced by that, but just looking at his group of friends, grown and different, he is happy it wasn't regular at all.  
Loki reads his poetry and he and Thor are holding hands under the table. He is not that bad as Tony said, but still seems too much introvert. Thor adores him, but their dynamics are still unclear.  
Steve and Tony spend their time kissing, literally eating each other’s faces, but nobody cares because they are happy. They are a very odd couple, but they work, with Steve's loyalty and protectiveness and Tony's enthusiasm.  
Pietro is the loveliest boyfriend ever. Irritating, hyperactive, annoying and always searching attention from him, he loves him so much. And he can't keep his hands off him too, he is always touching him and hugging him and caressing him. And how could he believe he didn't deserve Pietro - the thought of the poor boy with a broken heart still makes him feel guilty.  
Future now is not that important, worry too much is useless now that he know who he is going to live it with.  
He is his, after all, and it sound so good to hear or tell.

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Again, sorry for any possible mistake! You can comment here below or just send me a message [here](http://connieexist.tumblr.com/ask)


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